Early one morning I was thinking, and I finally realised what was wrong with life, the universe and everything. You know what it is? There isn’t enough credence. There’s billions of people out there, but so little credence that most people hardly get any. Sure, if you’re a famous novelist or a movie star you get stacks of credence - but what about people whose greatest achievement in life is to be able to walk in a straight line without falling over? Where’s their Freddo Frog? Where’s their congratulations? Ha! It’s not there at all. That’s what’s wrong with the world.

I think society should give everyone a medal or something just for being able to tie their shoes. Hell - just for being able to get out of bed in the morning, because sometimes that’s the hardest thing to do in the whole world. Sure, you could make a scientific discovery that wins the Nobel Prize, but you wanted to do that anyway. Give the shiny trophy to someone who decided not to jump off a bridge when they really, really wanted to. The point is, when we think of great achievements, we always think of famous people who did interesting things. But the boring things that people have to do in order to survive are often just as difficult.

Here is a list of things that everyone should get a medal for (or at least a bikkie):

1. Walking and not bumping into things all the time.

2. Getting a job and paying their bills.

3. Meeting friends.

4. Learning to sit properly in a chair without fidgeting. (I’m yet work this one out.)

5. Not hating everything.

So make today Credence Day. Give yourself a pat on the back for being able to do the little things that get you through life, because those things are sometimes the hardest of all.