I went to the funeral. It was sad, but bearably so. Here are the things I found interesting:

1. It seems that, in death, one is divested of the humility that one had during life. Which is not to say that the eulogies were exaggerated, or even lacking in humour. Just that everyone treats you with a much greater reverence when you are gone than they ever did when you were present to take the compliment. Bummer!

2. The music was silly. Sometimes it was meant to be, as when the coffin disappeared to the tune of ‘Whiskey Bar’ by the Doors. Other tunes, like ‘Simply the Best,’ however, seemed a little out of place. Mind you, I think almost any song with lyrics would be out of place at a funeral. Even though there might be a triumphal line that, at first glance, appears to apply to the deceased, the song is inevitably about something else – as when that gangster in Victoria was carried down the aisle to the tune of ‘White Flag’ by Dido.

3. Mind you, I could totally see the fun in being cremated to the tune of ‘Can’t Touch This’ by MC Hammer.

4. There are things that one shouldn’t think but inevitably does. First, all of the above. Contemplation of the deceased should not be interrupted by wondering what would be the dumbest song that could possibly be played at a funeral. Second, yes, I was checking out all the girls. Apparently it is true that the death of a friend puts one’s priorities in order; just that the particular order in which one’s priorities end up might be somewhat embarrassing. At least the deceased would have dug it.

5. That’s it. I didn’t cry or anything. Even though some of my friends did. It all seemed somehow normal. Not even all that sad really. Just an ending.